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Here’s the third batch of stupid e-mails from Stupid Wiz! Well, we’ve been getting more and more and more and more e-mails. We were wondering if the following e-mails were purposely composed to get under StupidWiz.com’s spotlight, so we decided to investigate. We will let you know when we post the fourth batch.

Stupid E-mail #1: Potato Chips

From: Roger Michaels < @msn.ca>

Hello!

I am a sales employee at a new mini-mart. As a promotional offer, we would like to send you 3 boxes of Lay’s potato chips. Each box contains a dozen bags of potato chips.

Please e-mail me your mailing address so we can send your free product.

Thank you,
Roger Michaels

First, we don’t believe that giving out potato chips can increase your sales, unless the potato chips’ bags have your logo or something to that effect. If it can, please feel free to correct us. Second, why are you sending stupid e-mails like this to really random people? Judging from your e-mail address, you are from Canada and obviously your store is located there. Do you think people from the other side of the world would travel thousands of miles just to buy from your mart? We don’t think so… people aren’t that stupid!

Stupid E-mail #2: Website Sale

From: Ryan Fuller < @.info>

Dear Sir/Madam

We sold our website, www..com just yesterday and we would like to request for your support to get it back. We were very hesitant to sell it and now we decided that we want it back so badly.

Help us!

Thanks very much,
Ryan F., Founder of

Again, why send a random e-mail like this to strangers? Sorry, but we can’t help you Mr. Fuller. First, we don’t know what to do if something like this happens. People don’t just sell their properties without proper plans, you know!

Well, unfortunately, we think that Mr. Fuller can’t do anything to get his website anymore. He agreed to certain terms/agreements, we’re sure of that! You know, agreements like “I send you money, I own the website” kind of stuff.

Stupid E-mail #3: Rights Taken Away!

From: Sarah Lamber < @.com>

To whom it may concern:

I am sending this e-mail to inform you that you have no right to purchase from our online store located at http://www..com, for you have violated our terms.

You may have violated at least one of the following:

1. Logging-in and logging-out repeatedly
2. Loading website pages repeatedly and purposely
3. Leaving short and nonsense comments on photos
4. Spying on other members

You will be rejected of future purchases on our website.

You know what? This is just stupid. We aren’t a member of her site. We didn’t even hear about her site before! How could we have possibly violated their site rules? And oh yeah, their site rules are… stupid. Really. Spying on other members? How in the world are they supposed to catch those spies? Geesh. Come on, people. Don’t act like stupid morons (We smell redundancy!).

Other posts that you might enjoy:

• Stupid E-mails: Batch 2
• Stupid E-mails: Batch 1
• Oops… We See Wet Underarms!